#GirlCode

In case it wasn't broken down for anyone before, the universal bylaws of "girl code" are being recorded at a rapid pace recently.  I would venture to guess that if, as a human race, we can get this hammered out then world peace is on the way.  Some to most guys out there may laugh, joke and mock at this matter.  Let me lay a real life situation in your lap though...

You're at the epicenter of all female drama: the late night bar.  A middle-aged man strikes conversation with a younger girl, briefly left alone by her friends.  The conversation is likely to go absolutely nowhere, but continues on nevertheless.  Moments later her best friend rejoins her.  While Friend A already knows the obvious (middle-aged single man and almost too "well-dressed") she's already combing through all the possibilities of wine tastings and Oscar-hopeful movie dates in her mind.  Friend B though immediately notices the shoes and knows a good thing when she sees it.  So when the time comes for the bar to close, there they all are: Friend A, Friend B and Rupert Everett.  I think we all know how this ends.  Friend B naturally shells out her number first, while Friend A is left desperately trying to whore out her dreams of a Tony Awards Dinner Party, complete with interludes of throwback musical numbers.

All this is to say that if the asterisk was not already there before, gay boyfriends are to be treated in the same way as heterosexual boyfriends.  It's #girlcode, girlfriends.

{Image via Miss Moss}

Wake Me Up When [This] September [Heat Wave] Ends

"Don't you love New York in the fall?  I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if I knew your name and address."--You've Got Mail

Due to the Great Heat of August/September '13 we have taken shape into molten-like creatures.  As a result, our words were not forming into complete sentence...since July.  While we begin to take relief on this this day of cooler temperatures, please enjoy some breezy autumn tunes.




(Image via Pinterest)

Chicago: A Love Affair

af·fair [uh fair] noun anything done or to be done; anything requiring action or effort; business; concern

Three years ago I made somewhat of an impulsive move to come to Chicago.  This was after I had already purchased a house right after graduating college...in St. Louis.  I actually spent my freshman year in Chicago at Loyola, and it was a hard decision then to transfer to Mizzou-though I always say it was the best one I've ever made.  Chicago has tugged on my heart strings for as long as I could remember.  I just could never shake it.  Moving there was something I had to do for myself.  


Recently though that pull just wasn't there anymore.  I cast my doubts about it aside, but eventually had to face facts that things just weren't the way they used to be.  My main objective these past few years was career success.  If I can give myself a momentary pat on the back, for someone of my age I achieved greater than I imagined.  I'm somewhat of a workaholic though in most facets of life, and when one goal is crossed off it's time to start a new one.  When career started to be less of a concern, the thing I kept coming back to was a home life.  Foreign ideas sprung to mind like dishes coming fresh out of the oven, picking out fabrics to upholster furniture in, and the always important dinner party.  Those are really the things I have been coveting these last few months, hard as I tried to deny it.  It just seemed so simple though.  How could I leave a city as cultured and wonderful as Chicago for...braised pork chops?  

I've been struggling with the word "commitment" for a long time now.  Perhaps since birth.  Most of the time, the first step to learning is to pick up a book.  So I picked up the dictionary and looked up this word "commitment."  It took all of one second to read, but about six months to understand:  commitment: engagement; involvement.  Being involved, staying engaged.  I could not honestly say that I had a desire to be either of those to Chicago.  I just had a need three years back to be here.  Typically though there are some tell-tale signs that you or someone you know are having an affair.  Looking back on my time here I am not sure how I didn't know sooner.

Passions and interests:  You have to have the same passions and interests to hold anything of substance with someone or something.  As I alluded to before, my interests and passions were evolving.  Not necessarily changing, but taking new forms.  Ones that were more supported and aligned in St. Louis.

Faith: Perhaps my biggest fortune while here was realizing faith.  You have to have faith to keep going in whatever it is you are going through in life.  Shortly followed by that realization is knowledge.  It didn't take me long to know that I had lost faith in a lot of things here.  Including, but not limited to, the almighty number from the guy at the bar.

Sadness Confused As Doubt:  Some people are better at making decisions than others, but no one likes making hard ones.  We think we're doubting ourselves often times when we have to make a tough decision.  The reality is we're sad to see something end.  To admit we've grown apart and that we have to move on is quite simply, difficult.

Staying for the Wrong Reasons:  I love to shop.  Chicago has every major retailer and important designer within its city limits.  I love not having to drive.  Chicago allows me to take public transportation, and more importantly Uber cabs here.  I love to try new restaurants and foods.  Chicago is the #1 city for dining.  I have so much right at my fingertips in Chicago.  None of them are actual reasons to stay though.

You're Not Always Right:  I've never been good at admitting I'm wrong.  Don't expect this to be one of those times where I do either.  It's just I was never right to assume that this could be my city.  I have no other word but "gracious" to describe the time I have spent here.  The streets I've explored, the restaurants I've ate at, the friends I've made, and my incredible career experience are invaluable to the person that I will be in the years to come.  

Chicago will always be one of the great loves of my life.  A grand affair to say the least.  It's time though to become engaged again.  To involve myself not just in passing phases, but lasting commitments.

So until we meet again, Chicago...so long, farewell!

Week In Review

Reviewing this week's big headlines from Gchat, text messages, and beyond.

• Has anyone ever looked more boss than Liev Schreiber seems to in Ray Donovan?  {Answer: no.}
• Good wit is hard to find, and well appreciated.  Welcome to Twitter, Hillz; you're profile is brillz!
• Theoretically speaking, nothing ever really goes away with Snapchat.
• If it's on Broadway, I probably cried.
• Team Gretchen or Team Anyone Else?  {My vote: Team Anyone Else}
• Keeping with Bravo, if you're not watching Million Dollar Listing, you're missing out on Ryan Serhant (a younger-and "real" life- Mr. Big).  Oh, and the New York real estate market is fascinating-really!
• Is 26 the age of regression for women in the workplace, or the awakening of the entrepreneurial spirit?  Taking shelter at home is sounding better and better these days.  Must be all that twerking.
• Okay, but really 26 ain't that old.  At all.  Let's brush up on our street lingo, ladies.  Don't let yourself fall victim to bad circumstances because of poor vocabulary.
• An addict and I know it.
• I thought I was in love and then I got to know the guy.  How could I be so wrong, when I'm always so right?  #MadMen
• More wine, please.
• Yeah, sure we'll watch the U.S. Open this weekend.  We're big golf fans.
• Happy June 15th to me!!!!  This retail freeze was killer.

The Big 1-5

Perhaps a 15th anniversary is the first mile marker of "feeling old" for some.  At least it seemed to hit people as such this past week when the beloved series, Sex and the City, passed that mark.  For me though it felt rather appropriate if anything.  I remember very little about Sex and the City making its debut because, well, I was 12 and [fortunately] sheltered.  What little memory I do have of its inception to premium cable television is that someday, not too far off, I would know what "it" was all about.  Not just the show, but everything surrounding it.  The fashion, the men, city life, and most importantly who I was (my 12 year old self instinctively identified with Charlotte).  Sure enough, 10 years and some change after that first episode aired, I wound up the proud owner of the bible and both movies.  I have cited every episode at least once in either giving advice to a friend, or justifying my own behavioral patterns.  In other words, I've learned some things from these gals, including the fact that you can be a hybrid, such as myself (Suzanne Iovaldi: A hybrid of Carrie and Charlotte-she so badly wants to wind up with a Harry, but she'll always go for, and wind up with, a Big.).

Yes, the show is...a show.  Meaning that the situations depicted are distorted for entertainment, and the characters themselves works of fiction contrived from someone's imagination.

But...is it really?  Just a show?

Some very importants lessons learned and moments shared from this work of genius:

• Every girl wants a sign.  (Season One, Episode 12) {Side note: for the best version of the song playing in the end, "No Regrets," see Phoebe Snow} 
• It happened to Carrie Bradshaw, it happened to Hannah Horvath, and it most certainly happened to you.  You're with the "new Yankee", and then you have a run-in.  Just climb back into that rabbit hole. (Season Two, Episode One)
• I am not a Samantha, but I admire the gal's character.  Having a friend or two who are "Samanthas" is a true gift.  I wouldn't trade mine in for the world.  (Season Two, Episode Seven)
• A picture is worth a thousand words.  While a hairdryer we can live without...on most days.  (Season Two, Episode 11)
• Any girl would go to great lengths for the mother-in-law of her dreams.  (Season Two, Episode 15)
• Grammar's not only important, it's endearing.  (Season Three, Episode Three)
• If it's not a hotel bar, it's a baseball game.  Or a restaurant in Seattle while you're on business.  It doesn't matter where, you will probably get on that elevator. (Season Three, Episode Nine) 
• It's one thing to not try things on when you're a Size 0.  It's another when you're a size 4/6.  (Season Three, Episode 12)
• Who doesn't love a very random #tbt to the days of smoking pot?  Anecdotally, will things really be as funny and memorable once it's legalized?   (Season Three, Episode 15)
• Falling down has since become the least embarrassing thing that could ever happen to me.  I thank Carrie Bradshaw very much for this as it happens to me a lot.  (Season Four, Episode Two)
• No self-respecting girl actually backs up their computer. (Season Four, Episode Eight)
• There are city folk, and there are country folk.  And it's just a matter of birthright.  (Season Four, Episode Nine)
• Everything's better in The Hamptons [and also perhaps the most important episode of the series.]  (Season Five, Episode Eight)
• The grass is always greener in Paris (or Chicago).  But home is where your friends are.  (Season Six, Episode 20)