Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Why Every Lady Should Know Something About Sports

Among other things you may not know about me (like that I can touch my tongue to my nose), I am an avid sports fan.  Specifically a St. Louis sports fan, which if you're going to be one, it's not a bad city to follow.  It never ceases to amaze me how many people are surprised by this fact.  Okay, the hot pink J. Crew sweaters and knits, along with every-type-of-leopard-print-shoe-you-can find may be a throw off.  Seriously though, if you are a female and claiming yourself to find absolutely zilch, zero, nada interest in any sport, here is what you're missing.

  • Straight men in tight clothing.  Granted there's some padding involved here and there.  For the most part though(see: Offensive Linemen), these uniforms sported on (and often times off) the field are very form fitting and quite flattering.  It's a welcome visual break after a couple episodes into just about any Bravo marathon.
  • You can yell...and no one yells back.  Unless of course you are in the wrong city/stadium/crowd, but that's more Level Two knowledge.  Otherwise you can yell, scream, tell someone their black and white stripes were so last season, and usually everyone around you will agree.  That other b**ch has no other choice but to take it.
  • Face time opportunities.  People go to games to have fun, believe it or not.  It is considered a social function of sorts.  You just never who you're going to meet in that 25-minute line for the ladies room.
  • B(3)=Free.  This is potentially the biggest reason you should be just the slightest bit in-tune with the world of sports.  Watching baseball, or any sport that uses a ball or puck (to clarify, that's all of them) at a local bar gives you free and easy access to booze and boys.  If you were wondering why you never meet any decent guys out at the club, it's because they were at the bar and got hammered about a half hour into the game.  If you ditch the stilettos or Match.com subscription and start out your night there, your chances of meeting a guy increases by five times, and the likelihood of your tab being paid for multiplies nine times.  It's just science.
  • People will like you at work.  Ever come into the office the morning after a so-called "big game" and everyone is talking about that "crazy play?"  Then you're asked if you saw it, and you think they're referring to the Real Housewives of New York finale.  It's really awkward.  No one likes to be the victim of blank stares.  Do yourself a favor then, and at the very least watch the morning news.  Catch some highlights.  Be a...dare I say it?  Fan.
{Image Credit: Little Black Journal}

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